Lust

[Admin Courtney]

"This has happened before, hasn't it?" he pressed. He needed to know what was going on, and onl AJ could tell him. The only problem was that she did not seem to want to. He could not imagine anything super terrible. Did she have the power to erase memories? That was the only explanation Ashton could come up with. Perhaps she did not have control over it, and was worried he would be angry.

He softened his expression, hoping it would calm her down.
"Aj, hey. It's okay. I'm not going to be mad at you or anything. Just tell me what's up. What is your power?" he asked again, taking another step towards her. She needed comforting. He hated seeing how upset she was.

[Admin Sydnee]

AJ hated that he was pressing the issue, but she understood why he was. He wanted to know what was going on and it was hard to think of an excuse or to even lie to him again after what had just happened. "I don't have super speed. I just made something up on the spot. I don't like lying, especially to people who just try and befriend me. All I ever want is friends." But she isolated herself from people.

She finally looked up at him to see that his facial expression had softened. His voice wasn't as stern either. "I'll tell you, okay?" she said suddenly as he took another step forward. "Just...don't...don't touch me." She knew it came out harshly, but she didn't know how else to phrase it and if he touched her again in an attempt to comfort her, she'd have to stop it again and maybe he wouldn't trip that time.

She took in a deep breath. "I...it's most commonly called lust inducement," she managed, unable to look him in the eye anymore. Her gaze averted to the door. "It's activated through any physical contact. Nobody ever remembers what happened afterwards. It's part of the strength of the charm." She couldn't face him and squeezed her eyes shut, tears spilling down her face and onto her lips. "I'm so sorry, Ashton."

[Admin Courtney]

Ashton set his lips in a grim line when AJ admitted she had lied to him about her power. While he did not condone lying, he gave her the benefit of the doubt and did not allow himself to be annoyed by or angry with her. She likely had a good reason for lying about her power, and he was about to hear it. At least he hoped she would be fair enough to explain it, especially since it had affected him twice.

He felt hurt when she told him not to touch her, but he was beginning to think it had a lot to do with her power. And so he refrained from walking closer to her, even if he did think she really needed a hug at that moment. But if she did not want him to touch her, he would keep his hands to himself. And then she explained what her actual power was, and his heart dropped in his chest.

Lust inducement. Triggered by physical contact. And no one remembers what happens.
His face ashened.
"No," he said, his voice coming out barely above a whisper. "But you pushed me away, right? That's why I was on the ground."

[Admin Sydnee]

She didn't want to hurt him, but she didn't know how else to go about telling him not to touch her. Ashton was a great guy, a nice guy with a care-free attitude. He was easy to be around. At least she imagined he would be, since she had a different experience that she didn't like to talk about.

"I tried," AJ managed, her voice soft. "You tripped over something though...and you fell. I don't....I..." Her voice broke. Hold it together, she kept telling herself. "I thought that when I left for Spiritus that there was no chance I'd ever see you again. I was wrong. I didn't think I'd have to confront this, confront you...or talk about what happened, but I hate lying to people and I can't lie to the guy who's done nothing but try to be nice to me since he got here."

She wiped away more of her tears as she met his eyes again. "This...this happened before with you. This wasn't...it wasn't the first time." Did he know that already? Was something missing from his mind from that night years ago?

[Admin Courtney]

Please, he was silently begging. Please say you pushed me away. I can't have done anything. I can't have. But he feared what he didn't want to have happened, did. He could see it written on her face, but that did not stop him from hoping above anything else that she would tell him that no, nothing had happened. That she had managed to push him away.

But the more she spoke, the more he knew. He had tripped this time, and nothing had happened. This time.
As she spoke about confronting him, he wanted to sink into a hole and never come out. There was only one reason for her to have to think about that, to worry about seeing him again. No wonder she had been acting weird. It had not just been a look of surprise on her face when he sat with her in art class that day. It had been one of horror. A horrific blast from the past. She had hoped never to see him again.

What a fool he had been, going out of his way to befriend her, showing her his power, going with her to get donuts, when the entire time all she must have been thinking was that he had forced himself on her. It was because of her power, but still. She had not asked for it. All the time he had spent talking to her, and she was probably terrified of him. Now it made sense why she wasn't going to the dance. He had pushed her to go, not making sense of why she would want to skip such an event.
But now the pieces fit together.

Because he was the boy who raped her.

The word swam around in his mind, growing louder and louder, taunting him.
"No," he repeated, feeling sick. He tried to speak her name, to apologise, but the words couldn't come out.
He swallowed hard, but a lump had formed in his throat. "AJ," he finally managed to choke out. His face had lost its usual brightness, the happiness that he was never without. "AJ, I am so sorry," he told her. He shook his head and backed away, giving her space. "I completely understand that you won't want to talk to me again. I shouldn't have bothered you. I shouldn't have..." He couldn't get the words out, so instead he just turned and headed as quickly as possible for the door, wishing he had the power of superspeed that he had thought AJ did.

[Admin Sydnee]

AJ finally clamped her mouth shut, the sobs getting stuck in her throat. She almost felt like she couldn't breathe. This wasn't his fault. She never wanted him to know because of that. He'd blame himself. He'd feel so guilty and he was such a happy go-lucky person. She didn't want to shatter him, but as she looked at him and watched the realization cross his face, she know it was inevitable.

"Ashton...it's not your fault. It's this damn power. I...I have to be careful. I try to be as careful as I can. It's not your fault it had happened," she tried, choking on her tears. She was seeing him break in front of her and she'd wanted to avoid this all along. This time it was her taking a step towards him, feeling helpless like others must have felt when they couldn't comfort her. Well, it went both ways. She was shaking her head. "Please don't blame yourself. You didn't know what you were doing. They never know." She reached out and then her hand fell to her side as he moved for the door. "Ashton!" She couldn't even pull him back. Her damn power. It was always her damn power. She started to move after him.

[Admin Courtney]

When he saw her step towards him, he panicked. He couldn't allow himself to touch her again. What if he... What if he did it again? She probably had nightmares about him. About something he had done without even knowing it. He was basically a monster. Intentional or not, he had done something to her without her permission. He might not remember it, but she certainly did. She would probably never forget the horrors he had forced upon her.

"No, just stay away. Oh god, AJ, I'm so sorry," he repeated as he grasped the door handle and pulled it open, then darted through it. The hallway was empty. Everyone had gone to Veritas for the ball. Good. He did not want to be near people. Not now. Not after he knew what he had done. How was he supposed to be around people now that he knew what he was capable of doing?
He knew it had been an affect of AJ's power, but he still felt at fault. He should not have even touched her without her permission. Even if it was an innocent physical contact. No, he shouldn't have touched her. He shouldn't touch anyone.
He wasn't even a virgin anymore. He was a rapist.

[Admin Sydnee]

AJ stopped moving, falling back when he'd yelled at her to stay away. She'd done the same thing to him minutes before. How was she supposed to stop him from blaming himself? She could only say so much to him, he had to believe it. "Ashton, it wasn't as if you had a choice. It's not your fault." The only way she could avoid this was to wear a sign around her neck that said "Do not touch." She remembered jokes between her and Gabe about wearing a sign that said "Can't touch this." It used to make her laugh, now she just felt horrible. Sometimes she wondered why she let herself even try to build relationships with people, it was a stupid idea. She should have never went to get coffee with Ashton. But she was only human...

She watched him darting through the door and moved after him, standing in her doorway and watching him disappear down the hallway that was dead quiet because of the absence of students. She felt as empty as the corridor. Ashton wasn't supposed to know. That's not how things were supposed to happen. It was her secret, the secret that only destroyed her. It wasn't supposed to get out.

Ashamed, she meandered back into her room and shut the door behind her, before collapsing onto her bed in a fit of tears.

[emilybuj]

Gabe felt as if he were going to explode. His insides felt like they were in knots and his mind was racing, trying to think of ways he could possibly fix his mistakes. And Gabe knew that he needed somebody to help him sort out these thoughts, or he probably would break down. Gabe was not good at handling stress or difficult situations. He liked to sweep them under the rug and pretend they never happened. This wasn't an option at the moment. Mikayla was upset, and it was his fault.

He knew that AJ and Mikayla weren't particularly close, but she was a connection between Gabe and Mik. And Gabe could trust AJ with his life. He knew she had stayed home from the dance - for pretty obvious reasons. He, of course, didn't blame her.

Knowing that there were likely teachers patrolling the halls by this hour, Gabe decided he'd have to get into AJ's room from the outside- assuming she was in there. He walked around the school, until he was under the Girl's dormitory windows. The rain was still coming down fairly hard, making it difficult for Gabe to see. But he flew up to the windows and peeked in each one until he found the 11th grade girls room. Sure enough, AJ was the only one in the room. Gabe knocked on the window as he hovered, hoping she would let him in so he could get out of the rain. It was freezing and he was starting to loose feeling in his limbs. Though the pain in his body was not nearly as bad as the ache in his heart.

[Admin Sydnee]

It had been hours since Ashton had left her room, since she'd told him what she'd never wanted to. AJ felt completely shattered and alone and not to mention guilty. She knew he was going to blame himself regardless of what she said, that thing didn't go over well. You couldn't just tell someone that they unintentionally raped you because of your power and expect them to be okay with it. It was just so hard to see him like that, to see a guy so smiley so....broken.

The novel she'd been reading had been laying abandoned on the floor. She couldn't go back to Jane Eyre, not after what happened. She'd just been lying there, staring up at the ceiling and contemplating everything and anything. She'd tried so hard to not feel sorry for herself, to not get caught up in her power and how hard it made things for her, but it was dragging her down. She couldn't bare to tell Gabe that she was back at square one when they went back to powers class. Then again, she didn't really want to do anything. She didn't want to be here, or anywhere. And in that moment, it occurred to AJ, that she really wouldn't mind not being here at all. Not existing. It would be simple. Nobody would have to feel guilty about taking advantage of her because of her power. She wouldn't have to deprive herself of social interaction. This wasn't right. This power wasn't and therefore, she wasn't.

She'd never really talked to anybody about it before, the possibility of wanting to kill herself, but it had crossed her mind before; however, now it was much more seriously. She didn't want something with a lot of blood, something easy and not gruesome. Peaceful. The thought strangely calmed her and she sat up in bed, only to be burst out of her thoughts by a tapping on her window.

Her swollen eyes darted over to the window where there was a figure pressed against the glass that water was trickling down from the rain. She blinked and stood up slowly, making her way over to the window, still in the dress she'd been wearing for no reason at all. Even through the rain, she recognized him by his hair. Although she wasn't in the mood to talk with anybody, it was odd that he was here during the snow ball. It was still going on, wasn't it? Or had she completely lost track of time and it was over? Still, Gabe wouldn't be hovering by her window just to say hello on a night like this. She knew he had a date. That date was one of her roommates, Mikayla.

She unlatched the window and opened it, getting sprayed in the face with rain. "Gabe?" She stepped back to allow him into her room, confusion etched onto her face coated over all of the other emotions she was feeling.

[emilybuj]

Gabe flew foraward and squeezed through the window, soaking the floor of AJ's room. He coughed a few times, his throat having been bothered by the rain water. And his eyes were red from flying through the rain. "Ugh..." he said as he noticed how soaked he really was. "Sorry," he grumbled. "I didn't think this through," he added, trying to decide if he should take off his jacket - but settled for just standing in one place as not to soak the entire room.

"I just... I needed to talk to somebody and you're always the first person I think of," Gabe explained somewhat frantically. "I lied to Mikayla accidentally and she yelled and me and it started rianing and... I don't know how to fix it. I just... I ruined everything and I can't think straight.... so... sorry... I don't know why I'm here," Gabe rambled taking more with his hands than with his mind. He sighed, and ran his hands through his soaked hair before finally looking up at AJ. Her eyes were puffy and red and tons of emotion etched her face. Gabe knew this night was not one AJ ever particularly enjoyed, but she was also not one to cry over her situation. Gabe knew that something had happened. And in regular 'Gabe' fashion, his concern turned from himself to AJ. "Have you been crying?" he asked, "What happened?"

[Admin Sydnee]

"It's fine," AJ managed as she ran to the window after Gabe flew in and shut it, latching it before sighing and dropping her arms to her sides. Gabe definitely had a problem and she knew it because he started going on at a million miles per hour about something with Mikayla and him screwing up. She was listening, she really was, but she was also looking away at the floor, not wanting him to notice that she'd been crying. She didn't want to have to explain. This was about Gabe anyway, not her. But there Gabe went, all concerned about her. She swore to herself and looked up at him, but something was different about him. Something was wrong. "Gabe-" she started, the word barely getting out. "Where are your glasses?" No sooner than the question left her lips, had she began moving towards him, suddenly just wanting to be near him.

All thoughts vanished. She was no longer concerned about why he wasn't at the snow ball any longer with Mikayla, or her own problems with Ashton. She lost herself as she looked up at him. His beautiful eyes and his charming smile. "Gabe, come here," she urged him, reaching out for his arm.

[emilybuj]

Gabe reached up to touch his face. "Shit," he muttered, realizing his glasses weren't there. He had forgotten already that Mikayla had taken them and thrown them off him. And now AJ was taking a step toward him with an outstretched arm "AJ... no, don't," he tried to tell her. His heartrate picked up in that moment. His eyes turned to panic. Because Gabe knew fully what was about to happen. And with AJ standing so close to him, there was no chance for Gabe to escape. And there was no chance that a charmed AJ could snap Gabe out of the trance he was about to be put in. In that moment before AJ touched him Gabe only thought how much worse what was about to happen would probably make everything for both of them. But Gabe only had a moment to think about it, because as AJ put her hand on Gabe's arm, he was sucked into a mindset he wouldn't remember when they separated.

Gabe closed the remaining distance between himself and AJ, wrapping his arms tight around her middle, and kissing her hard on the lips. He couldn't remember he was soaked. He couldn't remember what had happened between himself and Mikayla. Gabe was only concerned with AJ and how badly he wanted her.

[Admin Sydnee]

Usually it was one-sided lust, usually the other person just wanted her and she was left trying to struggle to get them off of her, but this was different. AJ was totally sucked into it as well, completely under Gabe's charm and the moment she laid a hand on him, he was lost to her as well. It had been a long time since AJ had touched somebody and today it had happened twice. But that wasn't on her mind. No alarms were going off in her head as usual. She was filled with a complete and utter bliss, unaware of the harm this would do to them both as his arms wrapped around her waist. Hers went up around his neck as his lips crashed down onto hers. She pulled his face closer to hers, deepening the kiss as her hands ran down his neck to his fancy dress shirt that was soaked from the rain, but she paid no mind to it, only wanting it gone. Less fabric between them.

[emilybuj]

Gabe finally got rid of his jacket - something he had wanted to do since it had begun raining. But now it was not only because he wanted the heavy waterlogged fabric off his body, but because he longed to feel his bare skin on AJs. He didn't care if she wanted the same, even though an onlooker would see equal enthusiasm.

He also ripped off his bowtie and threw it before wrapping his arms back around AJ, having never stopped kissing her. He let his hands roam, and his kisses began to follow, moving up and down AJs neck in power-induced desperation.